Self-Preservation, Anxiety, or Jesus

Sitting down to write when you have no idea what you want to say. What a drag. So instead of conjuring up some halfhearted attempt to say something…I’ll be writing what I’m learning. I’m reading through the book of John right now, along with other women by using the IF Equip website for morning devotions. Lately I’ve been thinking about preservation, more accurately self-preservation. Jesus escapes those who want to arrest him and stone him time after time after time. Something he just straight up walks away from an angry mob, sometimes he hides but he always gets away. But then… Judas. Through him came the most life changing betrayal of all time and Jesus saw it coming. The bible is clear that Jesus was acutely aware of his betrayer. Yet, he does not preserve himself. Jesus even sends Judas out on his evil errand in John 13: 27. Why hadn’t he saved himself at this, the most crucial moment? Well that’s because although he may have escaped mobs and persecutors in the past, it wasn’t out of self-preservation. Every time he escaped it was to the glory of God and the spread of the Gospel. And the same is true as he is “caught” and murdered. He stayed and waited and was willingly captured for the glory of God and the spread of the Gospel. Not even for the spread of the Gospel, for the fruition of the Gospel. He didn’t seek to preserve himself at all. He gave it all. And until it was the time for him to give himself for us, he anticipated that he would. He carried around the knowledge of his torture and death while we ministered. He carried around the knowledge of his torture and death even as he shared dinner with Judas. If Jesus doesn’t prove that we can truly lay down our anxiety for God to carry...nothing does. He didn’t self-preserve and he didn’t live in fear, he did the third thing. He humbled himself, trusted God, and gave every ounce of himself for the Father’s glory.

Such a humbling call to live each day the same way.